Crochet as a Deadly Weapon

 I know what most of you are thinking. "Deadly crochet? You have got to be kidding." But I am serious. As serious as a crochet hook to the eye.

"So sorry my dear. This stitch was quite difficult an I lost control of my hook. I'll run you to the hospital and the doctor can pop that right out. My bad."

There is also the case of a 4 year old girl in Turkey who fell on a crochet hook impaling herself in the heart.

The patient underwent emergency median sternotomy. After the 5 hour surgery she suffered no lingering effects. Come on mom. Keep the sharp and pointy objects put away.

In Salinas, California Maria Irma Dela Torre was shot and killed by police after rushing out of her van brandishing her deadly crochet hook. According to police statements in the dim light the hook of doom resembled an ice pick or knife. Dela Torre's family was awarded a hefty monetary award. Of course without an admission of  liability by the city of Salinas.

Here's a couple of pictures I found on the web of incidents of self inflicted hook stabbing. Theses are great but I could use a little more blood.

One of my fellow Ravelers had a great story of hook impalement. She is a seamstress and did this while working on a bridal gown. Dropping the hook she dove her hand into the yards of tulle and lace and Wham. Here's the gruesome x-ray to prove it.

Now if I was her I would proudly display this on a t-shirt. Or maybe a tattoo on my bicep.

Crochet is Bad-Ass.