Saturday, February 26, 2011

Poppies

“And now, my beauties, something with poison in it, I think. Something with poison in it, but attractive to the eye,  and soothing to the smell. Poppies… Poppies. Poppies will put them to sleep. Sleep. Now they’ll sleep!”
                                       
   -The Wicked Witch of the West
                                                     Warner Brother's The Wizard of Oz

 

Papaver somniferum or the Opium poppy. The botanical name means "the sleep-bringing poppy" referring to the sedative effects of the opiates in this flower.  

I found a lovely book with a wonderful pattern for one of my favorite flowers. Crochet Bouquet: Easy Designs for Dozens of Flowers 

Crochet Bouquet: Easy Designs for Dozens of Flowers 

Suzann Thompson's book has ton's of super cute flowers to crochet. The pattern instructions are straight forward and very simple to follow. If you are a new crocheter you may need a stitch reference book. I like The Crochet Stitch Bible.  

 For the black center of the poppy I used an alpaca tencel fiber to give it a little shine and I used a red acrylic fiber for the petals. What I thought was really cool was that you crocheted around a padding cord and then pulled to bring the petals closer together and get them in the position that you want them to be in.
The double strand of yarn is the padding cord that I crocheted around.

The center of the poppy is a separate piece that you make and then sew onto the flower. I jazzed mine up a little bit with some embroidery with red acrylic yarn .


The finished Opium Poppy!

Remember that Opium Poppies are for decorative purposes only. They are not for eating, ingesting, or consumption in any form. I do not condone, suggest, or recommend the consumption of Opium Poppies. But if you do please send me a picture. It always makes me smile to see messed up people.


Tuesday, February 22, 2011

Horror Dolls

 Over at Daph's Dark Little Corner I won a horror doll in her Valentines Day give-away. When she e-mailed me she was interested in making a trade for my Wisteria Skull Scarf so how could I resist getting 2 awesome horror dolls. I was so excited when I received my wonderfully creepy dolls in the mail today. All of Daph's dollies are hand made in a wonderfully creepy primitive style. I know these dolls are great because my kids are terrified of them, which makes me love them even more.
My creepy horror dollies and me.

Here's a full view of the Banshee Horror Doll. For those of you who don't know a banshee is an Irish spirit who appears and begins to wail horribly when someone is about to die. 

A close up view of Mort the Mortician Horror Doll. I even made up a lovely poem for him.
 
An Ode to Mort
Mort the Mortician liked to work in the kitchen
stitching up corpses all day.
But his wife the beautician didn't like his decision 
and had poor old Mort blown away. 


Monday, February 14, 2011

Happy Valentines Day

Happy Valentines Day everyone! I hope everyone is having a beautiful day snuggling and being all lovey dovey with their significant other. If not, do not despair for this post is for YOU. Yes the sad Valentines rejects who loathe the sight of chocolate hearts and roses. Those people who's blood boils at the very mention of Cupids name. Here my Anti-Valentines Dayers  is a poem for you.

An Anti-Valentines Day Poem
Hearts and roses and kisses galore,
What the hell is all that shit for?
People get mushy and start acting queer,
It is definitely the most annoying day of the year.
This day needs to get the hell over with and pass,
Before I shove something up Cupid's ass.
I'll spend the day so drunk I can't speak
And wear black for the rest of the week.
Guys act all sweet, but soon it will fade,
For all they are doing is trying to get laid.
The arrow Cupid shot at me must not have hit,
Cause I think this love thing is a crock of shit.
So, here's my story... what else can I say?
Love bite my ass... Fuck Valentines Day!


Next up is a nifty little project I found on IndieSpotting.com
 Super cute Valentine the Voodoo Pincushion. 
The instructions are easy to follow so this creepy little guy should be a breeze to whip up. Don't forget the snippet of hair from the soon to be cursed to stuff inside so that the Voodoo spell will work. I really need to crochet one of these guys. I love it!

Not into sewing? How about baking up some Anti-Valentines Day Cookies like the ones I found at Alliance Bakery and Cafe.
These cookies are hilarious. Who can resist a goodie with an attitude. All you need is sugar cookie dough , frosting and a little spite to make these easily at home.

Some of you a little lacking in the domestic department? Send an e-card from Heartless Bitches International 
With cards like these you can't go wrong.

So whether your spending V day alone or with some one you love. Remember, there's always somebody out there who has it worse than you.

HAPPY VALENTINES DAY!

Friday, February 11, 2011

Sunnyside Skull Scarf

Yes I can't help myself I made another one. But I totally fell in love with this yarn I really liked the variegated orange, yellow and pinks. It makes me smile. Especially when you live in the dark Northwest you need a little sunshine. Especially when in skull scarf form.
This scarf is in my Etsy shop. Go take a peek.

Monday, February 7, 2011

New Pattern Up

Hello everybody. I have a wonderfully new dirty little doily pattern up on my pattern shop page. The Doily Who's Name Shall Never Be Spoken Out Loud. I know long name for a pattern but it fits perfectly. It's available for $3.00 USD. The pattern includes an easy to follow filet crochet chart. Who wouldn't love a cunt doily of their very own?


Saturday, February 5, 2011

Wisteria Skull Scarf

Another one of my skull scarves has been finished and put up for sale in my Etsy shop. I really love how this one turned out. More cute crocheted skulls with wisteria flowers draping down the sides. This is made with my very favorite fiber, alpaca wool. I know I've said it a million times but that stuff is awesome super soft. I love the variegated lavender and purple color too.

 Check it out at my Etsy shop.

Wednesday, February 2, 2011

Two New Scarves In My Etsy Shop

This is just a quick post to show off two more scarves I've put up for sale in my Etsy shop.

The first one up is a beautiful maroon skull scarf. I made this one using one of my favorite fibers in the world. Baby alpaca wool. This stuff is so soft you just want it wrapped all over you.
Here's the link to check out more pictures and pricing. http://www.etsy.com/listing/67142491/maroon-skull-scarf

The next one is a hand painted Peruvian wool skull scarf. This wool isn't as soft as baby alpaca but it really drapes beautiful and is a sturdy fiber.  Here's a tutorial on how I dyed the fiber I used to make this scarf.

I have one more scarf to make and put up in my Etsy shop then I'd like to work on a couple new wicked little projects. I will keep you posted!